Elijah: the temptation to despair

"Elijah prayed for death: “Enough, LORD! Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors.” -- I Kings 19:4b (NAB)

Elijah had been running the race well. He had delivered the Word of the Lord to the people of Israel and had persevered through the 3+ years of drought and famine that followed. He had seen the Lord provide for him miraculously during that time. His faithfulness and trust in God had been rewarded by a spectacular victory in head-to-head combat with his enemies, during which the Lord had displayed His power in a spectacular way, which appeared to have opened the eyes of the people to the truth, leading to the slaughter of his enemies.

So why is Elijah now, just a short time later, on the verge of despair?

After this incredible display of the power of the true God, his life is threatened by the pagan queen, Jezebel. Instead of standing his ground and trusting that the Almighty God will come to his defense, Elijah, who just a day or two before was so courageous, succumbs to fear and flees. Now, hiding in the wilderness, he laments his cowardice and prays for death since, "I am no better than my ancestors."

No matter how powerfully we have seen God work in or through us, we are always just one step away from a fall. We are fallible human beings, and, as Brother Lawrence said, left on our own, we will always fall. Sometimes the Lord even allows us to fall -- note that I wrote "allows," not "makes" -- just to remind us that apart from Him, we can do nothing. (Jn. 15:5) When that reminder of our nothingness comes, we often experience great disappointment in ourselves, a disappointment that can even, if we're not careful, become a temptation to despair.

When that time comes (note that I wrote "when," not "if"), we must ask the Lord for the grace to humbly put our hope once more entirely in Him. If we do, we will find that He quickly comes to our aid, as Elijah himself experienced:


He lay down and fell asleep under the solitary broom tree, but suddenly a messenger touched him and said, “Get up and eat!” He looked and there at his head was a hearth cake and a jug of water. After he ate and drank, he lay down again, but the angel of the LORD came back a second time, touched him, and said, “Get up and eat or the journey will be too much for you!” He got up, ate, and drank; then strengthened by that food, he walked forty days and forty nights to the mountain of God, Horeb. (I Kings 19:5-8)

Dear Lord, when we fall, may we never hesitate to turn, brokenhearted, back to You. For our success is measured, not by who we are, but by Who You are--Our All-Powerful, All-Merciful Father. Grant us the grace to persevere in running the race, sustained by Your Love, most perfectly provided for us in the Eucharistic Heart of Your Son Jesus. Amen.